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MAE WEST – IT AIN’T NO SIN The Prologue:
Things I’ll Never Do by Mae West:
- Take another woman’s man. Not intentionally, that is. Even though all’s fair in love and war and it ain’t no sin.
- Try o be anything but myself at all time, publicly and privately, except on the stage or screen, for that’s where acting belongs.
- Cook, bake, sew, wash dishes, peel potatoes, eat onions, or bite my nails.
- Wear white cotton stockings or join a nudist colony
- Like opera, number thirteen, yodelling, cold spaghetti, rats, snails, men who shave their necks, or over-ripe bananas.
- Care for people who whistle in dressing rooms or checks that bounce as high as the stratosphere.
- Play mother parts, sad parts, dumb parts, or a virtuous wife, betrayed or otherwise. I pity weak women, good or bad, but I can’t like them. A woman should be strong either in her goodness or badness.
- Go nuts about classical music, sandwiches, cigar smoke, places that smell like hospitals, and black nail polish.
- Get excited over night clubs, contract bridge, fan dancing, bobby sox, the stock market, badminton or bust developers
- Be thrilled to death by orchids, anonymous love letters, souvenir post-card folders, earthquakes, slave bracelets, or beds with hard mattresses.
- Be bothered by Scotch money-lenders or boys who lisp
- Believe the worst about anybody without complete proof nor will I believe that it’s useless to struggle against so-called Fate – the phony!
- Walk when I can sit, or sit when I can recline. I believe in saving my energy – for important things.
- Write a story that is unsophisticated, because I believe that innocence is as innocent doesn’t.
- Marry a man who is too handsome, a man who drinks to excess or doesn’t carry his liquor like a gentleman, a man who is easy to get, easily led into temptation – unless I do the leading.
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